1. When you set out with hours to kill to hunt the best finds, the second hand shops seem to be half empty of merchandise and you never find anything worthwhile.
2. However, if you just pop in with 10
minutes to kill before your train leaves, suddenly there are about 20 different
items you don’t have time to try on.
3. And they change the full stock the day
after, so you’ll never see them again.
4. Similarly, if you take a friend with you
who always comments on what great stuff you find in thrift stores, when the two
of you go together there are only lame denim skirts with pink trim and burgundy
polyester blazers from the 90s.
5. Whatever amazing displays they put in
the shop window are never for sale or have already been sold.
6. For some mysterious reason, this
out-of-bounds window display always includes a clothing item you have been
hunting for for months, like the perfect pencil skirt or a mint coloured
blazer, or the cutest dress with a Peter Pan collar.
7. Anyway, you go in and hunt around.
However, you always have to realise that when the size and the cut is perfect,
the material or the colour are bound to be hideous.
8. Similarly, when the material and the colour
are perfect, the size and the cut are hideous.
9. When something is a gorgeous, saturated hue, the colour is bound to be bleeding. You may convince yourself in the shop that
the original owner must have lost weight, that’s why they donated the item, but
deep down you know you will have to handwash that damn gorgeous blouse from now
on until you donate it yourself.
10. “That lovely blouse is torn by the
seam? I’ll sew it up in no time! Let’s get it.” (This happened 2 years ago and
you still haven’t sewn it up.)
11. “That gorgeous skirt? It’s a bit too
long but oh, I will alter it, no big deal!” (It’s been 3 years and now you
actually use it as a shoe rag.)
12. “That huge shirt? The material is so
pretty, I’ll totally make cushions-dolls-bookbinds-whatever from it.” (You have
a whole drawer full of these and you don’t even own a sewing machine.)
13. If you spot a great colour and
promising texture from afar, by the time you get there, another thrifter has it
in her grubby hands and it’s an original Chanel blazer.
14. In your size.
14. In your size.
15. If you spot a well-known label and get
there first, it surely has greasy stains, or moth-holes, or comes in such a
small/huge size it’s impossible to alter.
16. There are plenty of beautiful purses to
be found in second hand shops, but the most beautiful ones have an indelible
smell hanging around them that you cannot get rid of, however hard you try. One
option left – carry the purse around but never open it. Which is sort of like
carrying a cushion around the city. Pretty, but pretty useless.
17. When you find something that’s missing
a button, it’s bound to be a coat with buttons coated in the material of the
original item. So it’s impossible to find a matching one and you have to change
all of the buttons.
18. Your coat is of course double breasted
and has 20 buttons on front and an extra 10 on the cuffs.
19. Finally you have chosen some pretty
amazing stuff that seem to be fitting you well. You go up to pay when you
realize that you don’t have enough cash, they don’t accept credit cards and the
next ATM is a 10 minute walk away. The shop closes in 5 minutes.
20. Of course this shop has a policy never
to set aside items for anyone. The perfect garment you had to leave
there will haunt your dreams for years to come.
Now is the time to admit it, you’ve experienced at least
one of the above!
Do you have any more to add to the list?
I’m keen to hear about your thrifting disaters. :)
(Clip art used above by Amy Morby)
(Clip art used above by Amy Morby)
